When Will You Get a Real Job and Other Questions

So my existence is perennially an ephemeral one, as per the many hundreds of kind folk who turn up to offer sage advice on how to have a good career, when to get married, when to have babies and other such so-not-personal topics (who are we kidding, right?)

So here’s a list of some of those wonderful questions (rhetorical and otherwise) that these enlightened beings pepper my life with out of the generosity of their dear, darling hearts:

  1. What do you really do for a living?
  2. So … (awkward silence) …  you work at the printer’s?
  3. Ah! So you check spellings and grammar for a living?
  4. When will you get a real job? I mean, you know, like real real.
  5. How much do you earn in a month (straight face, no embarrassment)?
  6. There is this boy, XYZ’s cousin’s brother-in-law’s uncle’s daughter’s third cousin from the maternal side who lives in ABC city. Shall we speak with them about you?
  7. (To my parents) Almost 30 now and not married! Is there a problem, if you don’t mind my asking? She seems reasonably suitable. Looks are okay too. Then what’s wrong?
  8. Why don’t you give Civils? How long do you plan to do this spellchecking work? (Ummmm.)
  9. What about teaching? Surely, you can become a teacher (Yes, I can. But I DON’T WANT TO. How hard is it to understand that???)
  10. So, what exactly do you do again?

Thank you, kind people who spare all the spare time in their lives to worry so much about mine. Where would I be without you? Really now *rolls eyes*.

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